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GORE CRITICIZES PRESIDENT; GOP Responds: "Politicizing War Effort Is Our Job" Vague, CA - (GNS) - Former Vice President Al "Albert" Gore sternly criticized President George "Harm's Way" Bush in a speech at the California Club yesterday. "He... just... is... not... doing... a... good... job," Gore said. "He... is... taking... too... long... to... do... something... good... about... the economy... and... he... is... getting... bogged... down... with... Iraq... instead... of... Al... Qaeda." Gore's four paragraph speech took three hours to deliver. Medical marijuana was distributed to the attendees to ease the pain. Gore said he could do better. "Rigorous,... thorough,... deliberative... discussions... need... to... occur... Then... it... will... be... time... for.. swift,... decisive... multi... lateral... action. GOP strategists and Administration insiders blasted Gore's speech. "He's making the American war against Iraq a political thing. That's our job," declared Karl Rove, a close adviser to the president. Ari Flyshirt issued an official statement from the White House, although he denied it was from the president himself. "Fool me once, there is shame. Shame enough to go around. The world. Fool me twice, well, you won't fool me again. Fool me three times and, boy, you're asking for it. Go ahead. I dare you. Just try to fool me three times. Fools rush in, but you better not tread on me," Flyshirt read. |
