[Visit The Gary Gordon Band; Get info on Gary's CDs]
America's Only E-Paper That Comes Out Every 5 or 11 Days!!TAKE ME TO The Fictional Times!
Established April 17, 2001
MAKE A DONATION
TO SUPPORT THE FICTIONAL TIMES!
Hi. If you like The Fictional Times,
please consider making a donation.
Thanks.
--Gary Gordon, Publisher, Editor, Stuff
|
SOME DETAINEES AT GUANTANAMO BAY PRISON TO BE RELEASED They Will Be Allowed To Swim Off The Island Guantanamo Bay, U.S. Part Of Cuba - (GIN) - After being held for nineteen months, U.S. Officials said they are now prepared to release some of the 598 "once-suspected Al Zaeda and Taliban fighters captured in the glorious yet arduous yet secretive yet necessary War Against Terrorism." [Music: Da dun da dun da dunnn!] According to Secretary of War & Glib Remarks Donald "Donald" Rumsfeld, "a half dozen or less" will be allowed to swim off the island. "They've been vetted, and although some of them are consevative enough and religious enough to qualify as GOP Federal Judge nominees, this detainmentship will probably jeopardize their appointments, given the leftist nature of Congress, so we're going to let them go," Rumsfeld said. Answering criticism that the detaining of so many people in such a secretive process was anathema to the American system of justice, Press Secretary Ari Flyshirt declared "The President stands for the National Anathema." "The system works," argued Sen. F. Thompson Watergate (R.-TN). Possible families of those detained didn't know whether to be joyful or not. "We don't know if our husbands are there. And the list of those being released is secret. Oh, if only we had shawls on our heads," said several women who might be wives of detainees. The U.S. Coast Guard has been instructed to keep an eye out for the detainees. "If they can swim to the Keys, they're good to go," said Lt. John Weismuller, USCG. |
